The Day Everything Changed

I always knew the day would come when my kids would grow up and leave home, but nothing truly prepared me for the moment it happened. The day after my youngest (identical twin boys) graduated from high school, Fred took Antonio to college. He was reporting early for football at Texas Christian University in Fort Worth, Texas. That was the start of what would be one of the hardest summers of my life. That will have to be another blog post because I definitely was not prepared for it all! Thank goodness I still had Marco at home. He didn’t report for football in Florida for another month! OH, and to top it off, Fred and I were moving back home to Texas as soon as we got the twins settled in college. Again, another blog for another day!

Becoming an empty nester was one of the hardest transitions of my life. I had spent years pouring my heart into raising my family, and now, for the first time in decades (my oldest was 30 at this time), I wasn’t needed in the same way. It was overwhelming, lonely, and at times, I felt lost. If you’re in this stage of life, know that you’re not alone. But also, know that there is hope, purpose, and even joy on the other side of this transition. All things I am still working on.

The Emotional Rollercoaster

The first few months felt like an emotional rollercoaster. One moment, I was excited about finally having time for myself; the next, I was fighting back tears in the grocery store because I no longer needed to buy their favorite snacks. I was also trying to “strong” because that was the façade I was used to showing. At some point, probably 6 months or so after that day Fred flew off with Antonio, I realized that I did not need to fake being strong when I was crumbling inside.  One of the key things I learned? It’s okay to grieve. This is a huge life shift, and giving yourself grace is important.

Finding My New Purpose

After allowing myself time to feel all the emotions, I realized that I had a choice—I could stay stuck in sadness, or I could embrace this new chapter with an open heart. That’s what I’ve been working on since June 1, 2018. Here’s what helped me rediscover my purpose and joy:

1. Reconnecting with Myself

For so long, my identity was wrapped up in being a mom, which I loved! Realizing that I had forgotten who I was before that though, it was time to rediscover what brought me joy again. I started focusing on my faith, personal growth, and self-care!!

2. Prioritizing Self-Care & Wellness

One of the best things I did for myself was to continue my self-care routine. Taking care of my skin was more than just skincare—it was a form of self-love. At the time, I was with another direct sales company whose skincare products I loved! I leaned into my skincare routine, giving myself time each morning and night to focus on feeling good in my own skin. Unfortunately, that line stopped working for me when the hormones started changing due to menopause. Thankfully, I found Riman in May 2024 and the simple act of using nourishing products and seeing my skin GLOW again reminded me that I was still me—a 56 YO woman with dreams, beauty, and a future full of possibilities.

3. Pursuing New Passions

With more time on my hands, I decided to join Riman—not just as a customer, but as a Planner! Their success, incredible products, and amazing opportunity, along with the support of my friend Jaime, made it an easy and exciting decision. I love that no matter where I am, I can run my business right from my phone simply by sharing what I love. Pouring my energy into something new has helped me shift my focus from loss to growth while also allowing me to build new friendships along the way.

4. Building a New Routine

Routine is important, and without kids around, I had to create a new rhythm for my days. I  established a morning and nighttime routine, and made sure to fill my time with activities that nourished my soul. Hint: Find a place in your home and make it your own by adding a fun chair, put it near a window, add some plants/flowers, decorate it, etc.  whatever brings you joy! I have a space in my house with my favorite chair, a lamp, my books/devotionals on a side table and it’s next to the window at the front of the house.   

5. Staying Connected

Just because my kids weren’t living at home didn’t mean we had to grow apart. I made an effort to stay connected with them in every way—phone calls, visits, attending the twins football games and even learning to embrace texting and FaceTime more than ever before!

Embracing This New Chapter

Looking back, I see now that the empty nest wasn’t the end of something—it was the beginning of a new season of life. It’s a time to rediscover yourself, pour love into your own well-being, and step into the next adventure with confidence.

If you’re struggling with this transition, know that your feelings are valid. But also, know that there is so much life left to live, so much beauty to embrace, and so many opportunities to grow. Take it one day at a time, be kind to yourself, and remember—this is your time to shine. ✨

Are you an empty nester? I’d love to hear your journey! Let’s connect and encourage each other in this season. I need it as much as you do!